P.E. nostalgia
17.11.05, 3:19 pm

Oh baby Jesus and all the angels, it is cold in my room today. To be honest, the house is always cold all the time at the moment, but it's especially freezing today. Vicky's gone home for the weekend, so we've decided to rebel against the system and put the heating on for a couple of hours. Until then I shall remain hunched up under my blanket with my legs crossed, trying to preserve body heat. You know, the freezingness wouldn't be half as bad if it was snowing or something outside - big hint hint there, South Yorkshire.

Seeing as yesterday I went to our lecture at 11 o'clock and found that I was the ONLY person out of the Neuroscience kids to bother turning up, and I consequently had to sit on my tod, I decided to miss today's lecture, and went to the gym instead. I always forget how much I enjoy the gym. As always, I died on the cross-trainer, because my stamina levels are appalling, and always have been. Cross-country running used to kill me.

My god, let's just reminisce about cross-country for a minute. Let me convey to the world just how much I loathed that P.E. activity with a passion. We had to do it in the term slot just after Christmas, up until year nine, and the route encompassed the school playing fields, a small hidden pond and a huge-ass mudslide. I never fell in the pond or up the mudslide, but I have friends who did. Miss Collier, the big butch P.E. teacher, whose only friends were dogs and who sported the traditional man haircut, used to make us run it in the snow, whilst she stood watching from the canteen window, sipping a cup of tea and smirking because she got to wear her big fleece and talk to the dinner ladies.

The dinner ladies, on a side note, were all haggard old witches at my school, and used to patrol about the place looking for small children to kick. One, who looked like she lived under a bridge with all the other trolls, wouldn't let me lean against the wall when we were sat in the Sports Hall, even after I pointed out that the wall was a supporting wall, and not likely to topple over from my added weight, and that there was about twenty other people already leaning on it. Anyway, I digress. I hated cross-country, especially because I was crap at it, and always ended up walking it with Lindz and moaning about the cold. I wasn't as bad as Liz though, who was even worse than me but who wouldn't admit to it, and instead walked with Hayley, pretending that the reason was in case Hayley had an asthma attack, not because she could only manage about 100 yards before collapsing in a sad little pile.

God, I'd forgotten all about school P.E. lessons. They made us wear stupid tiny-ass P.E. skirts in years 7 and 8, which were so pointless you may as well have been wearing nothing at all. Who does athletics in a skirt? They also made us play hockey, and the most amusing memory I have of that horrible sport is of Jodie. Jodie was my bad rebel friend, who lived a minute from me and who introduced me to smoking and other badness. She'd fallen out with Nicola, the resident skanky bitch ho of the year (she had no friends because everyone hated her and had been insulted by her at one point in their school lives) and decided to pay her back by running up to her, faking a tackle and then whacking her round the legs with her hockey stick. She cried and everything, it was fantastic. If I sound like a bitch then I don't care, because she deserved it.

Oh, and don't get me wrong either. I do like sport, just not the sport that they made us do. I really liked rounders, and got to be captain of the school team, and I was good at netball and badminton. We didn't get to play anything fun like cricket, because that was a lads sport, and were instead forced to do gymnastics. I'm really really inflexible, and you can probably all guess just how very shit I was at it. I can't even sit up straight with my legs flat against the floor.

In recent news, nothing fascinating has happened to me. Hypnotherapy was better, but I'll save it until another entry. We're going to see Harry Potter either tonight at ten past midnight or tomorrow morning sometime, which is mighty exciting. I really fancy the guy who plays Viktor, and there'll be lots of Ginger Ron. I seem to remember writing a comment about Ginger Ron just before the last film came out too... man, it's a bit depressing how predictable I am sometimes.

It is time to piss around on Dreamweaver some more and make out that I'm doing real work.

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