Post-Christmas Ladyfriend musings
27.12.06, 1:12 pm

Argh sorry, I was planning on writing before Christmas so that I could wish everyone a happy Christmas and everything, but then too much stuff happened and we had to stay at Ladyfriend�s until (almost) daybreak, so I had no chance. Either way, a belated Happy Christmas to everyone who reads this heap o� crap.

So, on with the report of festive events. Well, Saturday we went down to my gran�s for the feeding of the five thousand, and I ate my one sprout and one parsnip because it was Christmas. Her new telly is so huge you could hang washing out on it. I put in a request, but I�m pretty sure my dad will not be buying me one for my upcoming birthday. Anyway, the day was lovely, and my sister�s ex Chris (still big friend of the family) came over for tea, and it was all good.

Christmas Eve my dad dragged me and my sister over to Ladyfriend�s for tea. More on the deeper aspects of these activities later� for now we�re just on description work. We had to stay till about midnight, by which time I was near comatose and had a cracking sinus headache to boot. And I was forced to watch Calendar Girls. Got nicely drunk on mulled wine though, so it wasn�t completely hellish.

Christmas Day was the usual jazz that it is� Ladyfriend clan came around in the afternoon, took over my room and made the atmosphere as thick as treacle. Alcohol was the lovely crutch that it always is, and made everything much more bearable. Also kept slipping off to ring people whenever things got too rubbish. My sister left for Paris at five this morning. I really wish she still lived in England. Saying that she was, as always, completely unsympathetic about the ME, and made many snide comments about how she was a bit tired too. I�ve given up trying to explain, and also managed to bite back a lot of FUCK YOU themed retorts, which I�m pretty proud about.

Unfortunately Christmas was gatecrashed by the ME and Ladyfriend issues, and I think they exacerbate each other. I�m so sick of being ill. However, my �I�m so sick of being ill� stuff is old news, so we�ll get onto my other burning issue.

So here�s the thing� Ladyfriend�s kids have gotten more bearable, but Ladyfriend has gotten more unbearable. For some reason she�s gone from being unfriendly to over-familiar � she calls me Hol, which I�m not best pleased about � and now acts all cocky. But all with unfriendly overtone vibes, if that makes sense or is even possible. And I was exhausted and had very low tolerance levels to it all. I mean, obviously I was still civil and polite and excellent socially, but inwardly it grated like a giant nail file. God, it�s all so annoying. I want to like her; I want to like my dad�s girlfriend. I�m willing myself to like her so so much, but it�s not happening. No doubt she�s being over-familiar after my dad told her that I didn�t want to spend Christmas Day at her house because I didn�t really know her, and all the subsequent mulling over of my personality with my dad. I wonder if he�s told her about my anxiety gig. I bet he has.

Think I�m going to have to spend New Year�s Eve over there with them. I could just spend it on my own in Manchester, but my dad would be offended and it�s a bit depressing. I�m not being purposely over-critical of Ladyfriend� I can get on with just about anyone. I just get nothing from her. And I don�t like the idea of her knowing all this stuff about me when I hardly know her. It�s not very level playing fieldish. Sorry, I seem to be experience festive blues at the moment and they�re making this entry one long moan fest.

Good news is that James has been emailing me every day, and rang on Christmas Day. Have managed to not scare him off so far. Also, had a very 18-rated dream involving him last night, which never happened with Peter. Hope he�s thinking about me too.

last - next