Of travelling and mad rapists
17.08.08, 5:24 pm

My sister has now returned from her travelling stint of Vietnam, Thailand and Malaysia, which thankfully has ended the endless flapping that I had to put up with on the phone from my dad and grandmother about all the consequential mugging, raping and pillaging opportunities afforded to the locals. I�m currently trying to talk to her over Facebook now, after I missed her phonecall yesterday and she, in turn, ignored my text reply. The conversation is currently unfolding as thus:

Me: You�re back!
Me: Oi!
Me: Stop cleaning the flat! You�re blatantly cleaning, you always are on a Sunday.

I am quite jealous, looking at all her photos, despite knowing that I am spectacularly rubbish at going on holiday, as I enjoy it for about two days and then inevitably start missing England like crazy. I really am dreadful to go on holiday with; I don�t know how James puts up with it.

Anyway, I�ve finally found a new guitar teacher, and went for my first lesson on Friday after work. Having never met the guy before, I was a little on the wary side, and after laying eyes on him at his front door and clocking that he looked a bit weird, I have to admit that my judgemental first impression gene kicked my worry into overdrive. I found myself feeling quite anxious as I sat on his sofa whilst he made me a cup of tea, tuning my guitar and wondering if he was actually a mad rapist and I had just made the biggest cock-up of my life. One of my insane thought processes went something like this:

�Oh God, what if this guy is a rapist? I�m sat in some bloke�s house who I�ve never met before... okay, calm down, just look for your nearest exit. God, I really don�t feel safe... it�s okay, he seems to know a lot about guitars; potential rapists don�t often go to the trouble of learning guitar and then arranging lessons in order to rape someone... argh, but what if it�s an elaborate plot? Could just ask him if he�s planning on raping me... does make me sound VERY weird if it turns out not to be the case. Hmm, he drinks decaf tea... don�t think decaf tea is a rapist�s drink of choice...�

I mean, honestly. I don�t half think total drivel when wound up. I was probably right to be initially cautious, but it's a bit embarrassing thinking back on it now. Thankfully his partner turned up to say hello about fifteen minutes, and stayed in the back room for the entirety of the lesson, so all my rapist fears, however valid, evaporated. He�s actually a really good teacher, has instructed me to hold my guitar an entirely different way, and I actually sound pretty bloody good now. So go team me!

In other news, I chugged around Chatsworth yesterday with Indie, her boyfriend and James, and succeeded in absolutely killing myself. Today has consequently been a complete write-off, as, despite going to bed at 9pm yesterday, I have fallen asleep at least 5 times in front of the Olympics. I am missing Indie like crazy at work, and this week will be even worse as Katie and Nicole are also off on holiday, so I�ll be batting solo in the lab. I do have my appraisal on Monday though, and then my interview on Thursday morning to break things up. I�m then off to Dumfries for a long Bank Holiday weekend, with a long train journey to get there, and then a VERY long car journey with James�s mother on the way home, as she�s giving me a lift to Leicester (I�ll then get a train up to Sheffield.) That will be a very fun, extensive chat.

Better get going, as the boy has just returned from his walk and will probably be putting the kettle on. I�ve spent another weekend eating endless amounts of houmous, and yet my jeans are, yet again, becoming too big for me. What is going on? I should be the size of a house by now.

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