Stress levels rising
21.09.15, 10:12 am

My paper has been accepted, which means I’ll have a first-name publication! I’m so relieved and happy, because I genuinely thought it’d get bounced, and also because it’s taken me 2 years to complete and technicians hardly EVER get to write their own papers. And it’s also so nice to start an entry with something other than wedding nonsense!

But on to the main event, because we’re coming up hard on the finish line now. I’ve started sleeping poorly, which I guess is tradition for this kind of thing. It kind’ve feels like it did before I took my driving test, only x1000. James and I had a very sweet moment last night where we talked through absolutely everything that was worrying us, and tried to dissuade each other of those fears. And then wished we could go to bed at 9.30pm.

Whole weekend spent doing horrible arts & crafts, which it turns out is very similar to DIY in that it makes us snip at each other and feel like punching walls. We’ve made the seating plan board, which is basically a big map of Alaska with the tables named after the various places we visited, and drawing pins and string connecting the two together. It actually looks, dare I say it, pretty good. We also made an Order of Service and I folded 120 pieces of paper in half. The end.

James’s parents are arriving on Wednesday lunchtime. There’s apparently been some sad table decorations news (try to remain interested, readers): James’s mum had this slightly insane idea of buying blue and silver heathers from this heather-growing guy in the middle of nowhere in Scotland, and an order was placed, and then they drove up on Saturday to pick them up and the guy had basically just forgotten to do it, and James’s dad got so angry that he had to drive away, and now we’re buying the heather from a local Tesco. I think the moral of this story is to not care about table decorations, because even professional suppliers of table decorations struggle to.

The ceremony has been written, and we’ve also written our wedding vows. We went online to get some vow inspiration and dear God, some of the examples. Talk about vomitus maximus… all sorts of shit about souls touching and not being able to bear spending a day apart. As soon as we read that second one James was all,’ Erm, I’m going to still want to go away for a week of skiing with my friends, by the way’. So we’ve just gone for some nice, touching, non-histrionic vows, and hopefully I’ll maintain my usual iron self-discipline and not blub.

Has my dad written his speech? No one knows. Will Amanda be terrible on Friday night? Very possibly. Am I going to fall over in the dress? Oh God, everything is just laced with stress. Now I know what the early stages of ulcer development feel like. This may be the last entry before The Big Day. I’ll try and do one final quick one but I may run out of time. Wish me luck!

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