My bad rebel friend
19.11.05, 1:51 pm

Has anyone ever yawned whilst looking down, and ended up drooling all over the keyboard? Because that's what I just did. Sorry, that little story probably wasn't necessary in the slightest.

So, wasn't last night's entry a huge bundle of funness? Okay, I'll stop with the cynical comments, because I know that last night it was real and big and everything. Today, however, I am in a good, peaceful mood, and so shall be writing about the usual trivial, domestic issues.After I've finished doing this entry I will go back to my bastarding HTML for my thyroid hormone website, and hopefully iron out all the crap bits.

After weeks of bitching to the council and writing formal letters, followed by a "monitoring period", I am happy to report that Sheffield have finally supplied us with a bigger bin. Woohoo! It was outside the door on Friday morning as we left for the film, all shiny and new, and with our housenumber written on the top in black marker. I made a very inappropriate oohing sound and started stroking the lid, before realising that it was actually filthy, and only gave out the illusion of shininess. And then I wiped the black ming on the sides of my coat, because it's also black and because I have no shame.

Hannah kicked up a huge fuss on not being told that we had gone to the cinema, even though she told us that she didn't really want to go, and hadn't mentioned it for three days. It's more of the same boring "I always feel left out of things and no one cares" situation that we had all last year. This usually occurs because we tell her we're all going out, but she doesn't book it off work, and then when she gets a shift that night she a) claims we never mentioned it to her and b) bitches about being given a shift in the first place. Anyway, she's decided to get all mad at Mel about it, probably because she knows that if she got mad at me I'd shout right back at her, whereas Mel hates confrontation. The house currently has an Atmosphere, and I can't be doing with it at all. If she'd really wanted to go she'd have come asked us when we were going, but she's just using the whole thing as a scapegoat for her boyfriend problems/workload/hormones/tiredness.

Mel's currently playing mind games with Iain via text messages. I don't really have any time for this either, because I never play games with people and hate the idea of them, but I'm trying to be as sympathetic as possible. I'm currently relying on Michelle to lighten the situation in this house, which is something she's very good at. When someone moans about a trivial problem to her she usually just says, "Cossa possa fare", which is a phrase that I've probably spelt wrong and one that she learnt from her Italian students over the summer, and means "What you gonna do?". She applies it to every single situation possible, and it's pretty true, cos what are you gonna do really?

So much mushy Children In Need last night, it was horrendous. Don't get me wrong, the cause is very noble, but we shouldn't have to do it in this day and age, it should be done automatically. Plus it's incredibly predictable, with every sappy video having a backing track of something by Coldplay, and it's is basically the BBC just showing off and saying, "Look! Look at the people we can get on your TV! Aren't we spectacular?!"

Seeing as I don't really have any more recent events to write about, because my life really is that boring at the moment, I figured I'd bang on about something random for a while. Writing that entry about P.E. reminded me of Jodie, so I'll write about her for a while.

Jodie was a girl that I knew from about the age of 5, and she lived just down the road from me. She was generally bad news - was in a lot of fights, slept with loads of guys and was a compulsive liar. She was good fun though, made me laugh a lot, and I guess everyone's had at least one bad influence friend, and knows how it is.

She introduced me to smoking when I was 15, sat under a bridge somewhere near my house. I guess I tried it because I was a bit messed up back then, still dealing with my mum's death and arguing almost every day with my dad. I wanted to do something I knew was stupid, something I knew my dad'd hate. Anyway, it started out like that but I soon got the nicotine bug, and as soon as I realised how well cigarettes and alcohol went together it went downhill from then. It wasn't a full on habit, maybe one or two a day, but it was still there. When I came to university, the friends I made on my corridor (now housemates and friends) were all non-smokers, but I still didn't quit, not until I got Freshers' 'Flu really badly first week. I suddenly realised that if I kept on then I'd end up feeling like I had 'flu constantly, and would probably die from something horrendous like emphysema. It was a pretty sobering thought, and I quit that day.

It wasn't a clean quit though, as I've stopped and started with Bernie dying and the shit after it. Smoking's kind've comforting, a distraction, like going to see an old friend. I haven't smoked in in a long while now though, and I get the feeling that I won't again. Obviously something awful might happen and I might lose the willpower, but fingers crossed it doesn't.

Wow, I do love this burrowing into my past life. I forget about all the minor stuff that happened, although it felt like end-of-the-world stuff at the time. I lost contact with Jodie once we left school - I went on to 6th form and she went off to college. She made me drink a hell of a lot of White Lightning once, which is something I'll never forgive her for. I then had to stagger home and do my best sober act for my dad, which can't have been anything other than Oscar-worthy.

Wow, that really did just ramble on and on.

Edit: Just went into Becky's room to ask for her opinion on my website and found her sat on the floor hairdrying her feet because they were so cold. She was sat on my bed last night watching Animals of Farthing Wood whilst I worked on the site, and she could quote every line off, even though she hadn't seen it in about 10 years. She also cried when the badger died, which I found incredibly cute.

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