yummy curry vs the manky sink
1st May 2004, 4:33 pm

i got my exam timetable the other day - two on the first week and one the second, with the third week left free. pretty well positioned, but i'm gonna have to start doing serious revision soon if i'm gonna be anywhere near ready for them.

revision's been hampered this week though, because i've had the worst goddamn shitty sonofabitch week ever. and yes, that is it's full title. i don't know who's fantastic idea it was to decide that this week was going to be horrific, or that it should be this week that i get to have a lecture on brain death, but for the record it was a bad idea. no really, it was. go god, it's not your birthday.

i'm still feeling horrific, but trying my best to block it out. things are now definately sinking in... i can tell because everytime i think of bernie, and follow it with the inevitable "she's dead" thought, the level of emotion that follows it has more than doubled, and hurts a lot more. thursday night was the worst, followed closely by the whole of tuesday, which i spent most of in bed because i didn't have the motivation to do anything else. but yeah, thursday night was the night where i just gave up being in control, and just let all the feelings that i've been blocking out just wash over me. i went to see mel afterwards though, and she was great. i think now i've explained the stage i'm in grief-wise she'll be keeping an eye on me, which makes me feel safer. she said that it was probably a good thing that i'm finally coming to terms with things, and i agreed with her. it's just gay timing.

my dad found out the length of the waiting list for seeing a psychologist in salford currently stands at 4 months. by the time 4 months is gone he'll be feeling better. a sarcastic comment isn't even needed to summerize this paragraph.

the rest of my week has been a mixture of watching day-time telly, doing a lot of note writing to fill in the gaps in my lecture notes and sitting talking to dave and mel. i also went out for a couple of drives with rich. ooh, on wednesday night me and rich cooked a curry in the g-floor "kitchenette" - ie a tiny cupboard containing a fridge, microwave, grill/2 hob cooker (only one works at a time, so you can't cook and grill... god stop being greedy, it is only a kitchenette you know) and a manky sink. the sink is usually home to two week old stagnant water, where old plates and bits of rotting pasta float around. therefore the curry was surprisingly nice, even if we did buy pitta breads rather than naan breads. it was also much more appealling-looking than the mince beef pasta bake on offer down at the canteen.

revision is calling, quietly. it'll probably be ignored until the snooker finishes.

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