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27th November 2004, 8:14 pm

my gran's keyboard is so much nicer than mine, i'm thinking about stealing it. at the moment my gran's watching who wants to be a millionaire, joining in with all the questions (even the really simple �100 ones, saying the answer out loud like they're incredibly difficult).

yes, i'm in nottingham for the weekend. i've actually been here since thursday night, so consequently missed my lectures yesterday. i do feel bad about that, honestly. it's absolutely boiling in my gran's house, i wish we could have the door open. insane that i crave my cold house at home, but as soon as i get back tomorrow i know i'll be bitching about how cold it is, whilst wearing my scarf and hat indoors.

it's grey and cold in nottingham, just like it usually is. it always feels like i'm home home when i walk through nottingham station, even though it's the least home out of the three i've got. sometimes, when i'm bored, i sit and think about What If, and if my mum hadn't have died then i would still be living in notts, in the same house, and i probably wouldn't be at my gran's right now because i wouldn't have come home this weekend. and i'd have no idea who bernie was, yet she would have died regardless, except maybe on her own in bed, which is a thought too horrible to think about.

my gran's mentioned christmas a lot; i've been studiously ignoring it.

my period's late, again. i'm praying that it's not going to skip a month, like it did last time. i hate being irregular, it's similar to being late, something i always avoid.

seeing busted tomorrow night, still haven't quite come to terms with it. we're going to be the oldest people there, bar the parents/gardians, and i don't even like their music that much! still, the atmosphere will be good, and i will have fun cos everyone else is going. i just won't tell any of my non-uni friends i'm going, cos then i'll lose my cool aura.

i should go now, as i said i'd ring my sister once x factor finished. it's the result in half an hour, and i'm sad to say that i'm totally addicted.

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