wobbly times
6th December 2004, 10:31 pm

apologies for the long gap between entries. i'm currently feeling very unwell, for reasons unknown, and haven't felt up to writing an entry.

i've been having these dizzy spells for a while now, but i figured i was just imagining them, or bring them on myself. it got really bad last monday, and i thought they were anxiety attack things, as they only seemed to come on when i was in lectures, or out and about. i went to the doctors monday night, and they perscribed me valium, which was worrying to say the least, and told me to go to some counselling sessions. tuesday morning i woke up feeling dizzy and odd, and i thought i was freaking out again, to the extent of me not being able to leave the house. i rang my dad and told him i wanted to come home... ended up crying, em found me on the stairs and gave me a big hug, told me i'd be fine eventually.

anyway, my dad came that night and drove me home. i'd felt shakey and on edge all day, so it was a relief to finally be on the move. turns out i felt shakey all night, and again when i woke up the next day, so i finally figured out that it was actually something to do with my health, and not my mental welfare. i stayed home till sunday, and felt increasingly shitty, with weird tense feelings in my legs, difficulty keeping my balance and general wobbliness. i also had no appetite, and felt stupidly full after the smallest meals. my the train journey home was fun on sunday, i was just praying i didn't get a particularly strong woozy burst in the middle of the pennines.

so i went to the doctors again today, and they did a load of quick checks to do with sight, hearingm balance and hand-eye coordination. i failed on the balance ones, blatently. i've got to go back tomorrow and get some blood tests done... mel's just minged me out with horror stories of when she had blood taken, so kinda not looking forward to it now. really hoping they find out what's wrong with me, because i've now progressed to the stage where i feel sick almost constantly until mealtimes, when i slowly feel hungry, but then once i eat i feel sick again... repeat to infinitum.

i hate being ill, it sucks ass. i'm dead moody, and getting way too much sleep, and i'm missing way too many lectures. i'm so far behind it's not even funny... going to have to do so much revision this christmas just to understand my lectures.

okay feeling tres wobbly, shall have to go wobble off to bed and watch more buffy.

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