counselling and lies
18th January 2005, 9:45 pm

i don't seem to be as forthcoming in the revision area tonight... in fact make that all day. revising cell signalling is one of the most difficult things in the world, not least because it's SO FRICKING BORING. as soon as my notes start banging on about transmembrane domains my brain just switches off, and instead starts thinking about what's for tea, or whether it's time to take a break and watch some buffy.

i went to the counselling service today, and have an appointment on thursday morning at 9, so fingers crossed i start getting somewhere. i talked to hannah about it last night, cos it was getting me down, and the fact that no one else knew about any of it made me feel more down. i lied to vicky this morning though - told her i'd been to the union and back rather than the counselling service when i got back in the house this morning. until i've started getting this thing under control i think i'm more comfortable with less people knowing. i'm definately not telling my dad about it; he's got enough to worry about without all my shit.

i downloaded kate rusby - old man time. she has possibly the most beautiful singing voice in the world, and the song just melts my heart.

michelle bought cake today, after doing her politics exam. for some reason she had the marie antoinette quote, "let them eat cake" running through her head the whole way through it, which made her crave for cake. it was very good cake too, lots of chocolate, although the gooey red bit at the end tasted a bit like calpol. mmm calpol, the purple one was so delicious; i used to pretend to have a headache so i could have some syrupy goodness.

lise phoned last night. she'd dug out her old year 11 leaving book, and proceeded to read out what i'd written to her. mentioned something along the lines of, "writing this with your pen, thanks for lending me this pen by the way... for the last three years". heh i'd totally forgotten that i'd stolen her parker pen, nevermind for 3 years.

talking to hannah over msn about wheher "suckiness" is a word, and whether it'd be a good idea to use it in my cell signalling exam or not. it's very lazy, especially as she's only about 20 yards away on the other side of the house.

we've finally been food shopping (well not me personally, seeing as i have 7 exams to go still, the most out of the whole house, so they let me off) and consequently the fridge is full again.

i'm sat playing that kate rusby song over and over again... i bet vicky's getting really sick of hearing it.

i think i have to move out of this damn room; i'm incredibly sick of it. trouble is, it's absolutely freezing downstairs, so i'm kind've stuck between a rock and a hard place. i've eaten four packs of fruit pastilles in two days, that's so damn greedy! i've only just noticed, god i'm a disgrace.

my tree's still looking remarkably dead, in case anyone's wondering.

last - next