Big long Amy rant
29.11.05, 5:53 pm

Amy subjected Paddy and me to the most amazing rant today on the walk down to lectures. I should write it all in capital letters, but that�d probably get annoying, so just assume that it�s in capital letters� worth volume. This is the reason that my swearing is so bad sometimes; imagine this with a strong Scarborough accent:

�� and so I was standing at the end of my road, with my suitcase, you know, and the pissing bus just went straight past me. And then when he finally did stop, the driver said �Oh, well you should have waved or something� so I said, �Well, you shouldn�t have fucking been ten minutes late, should you?" Why the hell else would I be standing at the bottom of my road with a pissing suitcase except to get on the fucking bus? And then the bastard wouldn�t start driving, just kept moaning at me. And when I finally do pissing well get home, I find that the lads had eaten the rest of my crisps, my biscuits and even my fucking cereal bars. I�m sorry, but what lads steal fucking cereal bars? No offence, Paddy, but you just don�t, do you? God it�s put me in such a fucking bad mood, I�m dead grumpy now."

Had two very good lectures on sodium-gated ion channels (yeah okay, blatantly no one�s caring) and personality disorders. Paddy was eating a Mini Roll before the first lecture, and I told him that he smelt of cocoa powder. He claimed to not be able to smell it, and so got me to eat a bite and then to breathe on him. Apparently I just smelt of the purple Tutti Frutti that Amy had just given me. I think I want to be a student forever.

Hypno was class as always, but my taxi driver on the way there insisted on bitching about the dazzling sun, the parked cars and the other drivers for the entire journey. Man, I really don�t care! I can�t exactly tell the sun to piss the hell off, nor can we legally run the granddad in front of us off the road, so just suck it up and get on with driving. Oh, and stop talking too. I walked home as always and got really quite cold.

Had a lab yesterday afternoon that managed to reach no. 2 in the list of Things I Have Done At Uni That Have Made Me Want To Kill Myself � No. 1 was that soul-destroying lab where I had to actually measure how mice walk, the experiment I�m now writing up. This lab was on morphometry, which should translate to �ultimate dog wank� but which actually translates to �measure of biological structures�. It involved pictures of cells, a tiny grid of squares and a lot of counting. And then lots of maths. And then more counting, and then more maths, and then questions about the counting, and then more maths. Man, I wanted to die.

Okay, now onto the serious bit. Last night Mel found out that her sister has multiple sclerosis, which was very intense and awful and everyone felt supremely useless. Em and me felt quite depressed too, I think because we both know a lot about the disease, whereas everyone else was along the lines of, �What exactly is MS?� Mel didn�t really seem to know much about it either, and I wasn�t about to sit there and tell her about it and make her even more upset.

She went down to Coventry today to see her sister in hospital with her family, and I got a phonecall at ten o�clock (mid The Jeremy Kyle Show) from her that began with �Hol, I�ve done a really stupid thing.� Turns out she put the house phone in her bag and forgot about it, and so we�re without a landline for a few days. This at least means that we�ll get a break from the incessant amounts of people who want to look around our house. JUST RENT IT DAMN YOU.

I�ll finish with some good news, which is that we had our first snow yesterday. I got a little too excited and decided to bounce on my bed and watch it falling through my skylight. I hadn�t bounced on my bed in ages � when I was three I fell awkwardly from bouncing and broke my left arm, so I�ve always been a little wary since � but it was reat good fun. In fact the snow was reat good fun too, until I realised that I had to leave the vaguely warm and dry house and go to my lab. Watching snow is fantastic. Walking in the snow starts off as being fantastic too, but eventually your hands just get too cold and your jeans get soaked. When I got out of my lab the snow had all gone, but it was still freezing so I put on my Lesbian Hat � only the second time it�s been worn in public. Paddy and B told me that it wasn�t lesbian-like at all, which is a definate yay, and I really want to believe them, but I find it hard to because Lisa once told me that I �look like the gayest thing ever� in it.

Cup of tea, eat some food, another cup of tea. Plan.

last - next