Secret lesbian
21.02.06, 3:36 pm

So, a few months ago my dad asked my sister if I was gay. And thought that Lisa and I were maybe a lesbian couple. Want to know how this all came about? Because when Lisa was originally going to go to China for the summer, and I consequently wouldn�t see her on her birthday, I recorded a message for her and burnt it onto a CD. My dad found this � he�s so nosy, don�t believe for a minute it was an accident. The offending part of the message reads as thus, if memory serves me correctly:

�So yes, send me a postcard... one with something red on it! Maybe a hot girl and something red, that�d be nice *pause* You know, I bet my dad�s sat in the other room listening to me saying all this, and he�ll have heard me talking about hot girls and now thinks that I�m gay. So I�ve just come out to my dad without even meaning to� I�m blaming you for that.�

God, I am the worst rambler ever. Anyway, maybe an easy enough conclusion to jump to, but then apparently him and my mum had always had suspicions about me, since about the age of 11, and thought that my boyfriends were just big cover-ups. Apparently they were convinced that I was a big lesbian since my childhood.

This all came out from talking to my sister last night � my microphone came in the post, so we had our first wunderbar conversation. Felt a wee bit geeky talking into a mic stuck to the side of my monitor, but I haven�t spoken to her in forever and we talked for a good two hours. I got sod all work done last night. Anyway, she randomly told me about this when I asked if she�d spoken to my dad recently. The housekids all find it hilarious (as I�m writing this a Melissa Etheridge song has just come on randomly... very funny, Life) and it is amusing, but at the same time it makes me a little sad, because it�s just another indicator that my dad doesn�t really know that much about me at all.

Anyway, onto more mundane developments. Went and played badminton with Michelle, Becky and Dave yesterday afternoon, and feel a little crippled today. Michelle used to play for Essex County, and kicked our asses pretty squarely, and that was after she�d gone and swam two and a half miles in the gym pool. I�m way too competitive for my own good for the record, and fell over at least twice, but it did save the point so well in. Oh, and Michelle hit me round the head with her racquet, that was fun.

Feeling kind�ve tired today, as I was up until one last night talking to Rich. You know that crappy feeling you get when you�re worried about other people, and hope that things turn out okay for them? I have that today, because I�m worried about at least three of my friends. I also had minor housekid angst and tears last night with Mel, as she got her exam results back, and although they were all 2:1s they weren�t as high as she�d hoped - Mel�s a perfectionist and works herself to the bone, and doesn�t know what else she can physically do to get better marks and now thinks she�s actually stupid. That was all quite draining as well. My results are out sometime next week and I�m slowly growing more and more apprehensive.

Anyway, in more positive news I�m seeing Nickel Creek tomorrow night. That I can�t wait for. It does mean that my dad�ll be down here in chez Sheffield, which always freaks me out slightly because it�s like my two worlds colliding. In more negative news, Vicky�s winding up for the mother of all stress-outs over nothing in particular. I have no idea at all what is wrong with her at the moment. Right now I�d better go do some more work for my sodding Long QT project. I�ll warn you now y'all, you�re going to end up total experts on LQT and get immensely sick of me banging on about it so much. This library project is slowly taking over my entire existence.

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